He's doing it again.
他又來了。
Just when I'm about to slip into something a little more little, he lets a dirty little secret slip through the crack. Nothing turns me off like a heaping dump or some freshly churned colon sausage, or an intestinal cigar recently rolled and still smoking. Ten out of ten women agree that their fellow's feces is unbearably foul. You know who you are!
正當我準備要再穿上一些更露的衣服,他從屁屁裂縫滑出一條髒兮兮的小秘密。沒有什麼比像是一大堆垃圾、或是比新鮮現攪的結腸香腸(註一)更讓我掃興,或是一根剛剛才捲好、還冒著熱氣的腸道雪茄。十個女人中有十位都同意,她們伴侶的便便就是讓人難以忍受的臭。你知道我在說你吧!
And what about the oxygen gagging semi-solutions he uses to mask his disgusting deposits? Matches? Aerosol? Both? What if there was a natural, more effective way to make certain you never have to smell his man manure again?
那些他用來掩飾他那噁心排泄物、令人缺氧的混和溶液呢?火柴?芳香噴霧?兩個都用?如果有個天然、且更有效的方式能確保你再也不用聞到他的男性糞便呢?
Poo-Pourri.
Poo-Pourri。
Poo-Pourri is the before-you-go toilet spray that is proven to stop his suffocating stench before it starts and save your relationship. Simply spritz Poo-Pourri in the bowl to create a barrier on the water's surface that actually traps odor into lavatory lockdown, preventing an air assault before it begins. So all you can smell is the delightful blend of essential oils.
Poo-Pourri是證實能在開始之前就制止他那令人窒息般的臭氣的「事前」廁所噴霧,並拯救妳的感情。只要將Poo-Pourri噴在馬桶裡,在水面形成確實將氣味抑制在廁所牢房裡的一層屏障,在它開始散發之前就預防臭氣攻擊。所以你可以聞到的全是精油的迷人調和香味。
Yes, it is a real product. And yes, it really works. There are over 1,000 reviews rating it 4.8 of 5 stars. If Poo-Pourri isn't the perfect solution to his stinking pollution, send it back for a full refund—our open-door stink-free guarantee.
是的,這是真實的產品。而且沒錯,它真的有效。有超過一千條評論在5顆星中評價4.8顆。如果Poo-Pourri並不是對抗他那臭氣汙染的最佳解決方案,將它寄回全額退費--我們「門打開也聞不到臭味」的公開保證。
If your man's movements have started a relationship revolution, click here to get him Poo-Pourri today at Poo-Pourri.com. Try one of our more masculine scents like Trap-A-Crap, or Royal Flush, Heavy Doody or extra-strength Poo-tonium for your companion carrying hazardous cargo.
如果妳男人的腸道運動已經開啟了一場感情革命,今天就按這裡到Poo-Pourri.com買瓶Poo-Pourri給他。試試我們更有男人味的香味之一,像是「逮到便便」、或是「皇家同花順」、「重型嗯嗯」、或是超強力的「便便終結者(註二)」,獻給妳那身懷危險貨品的伴侶。
Poo-Pourri, our business is to make it smell like his business never even happened.
Poo-Pourri,我們的使命是要讓他的屎命聞起來像從未發生過一樣。
註一:結腸香腸指的是許久未排便,堆積在結腸處的排泄物,就像絞肉灌進腸衣一樣,呈現出香腸的外表。
註二:取 plutonium 的諧音。而 plutonium 是製造核彈的原料「鈽」。
- 「迅速穿上」- Slip Into
Just when I'm about to slip into something a little more little, he lets a dirty little secret slip through the crack.
正當我準備要再穿上一些更露的衣服,他從屁屁裂縫滑出一條髒兮兮的小秘密。 - 「掃興」- Turn Off
Nothing turns me off like a heaping dump or some freshly churned colon sausage...
沒有什麼比像是一大堆垃圾、或是比新鮮現攪的結腸香腸更讓我掃興... - 「確保」- Make Certain
What if there was a natural, more effective way to make certain you never have to smell his man manure again?
如果有個天然、且更有效的方式能確保你再也不用聞到他的男性糞便呢?